Wednesday, 1 July 2015

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner Split – Did You See It Coming?

Tabloids have been speculating that Hollywood couple Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck were on the brink of divorce for several weeks now.

ben-affleck-jennifer-garner-splitSeeming like a rare genuine solid Hollywood couple, many dismissed the rumours as unfounded gossip.

However, today a spokesperson for the couple confirmed that the couple are indeed separating after ten years of marriage.

As much as you hate it when the media turn out to be right about something like the break up of a family (Affleck and Garner have three children together), news like this is often not surprising.

I think one of the main reasons that I, like many other people, am interested in showbiz news is that it’s interesting to analyse people’s behaviour and relationships. I feel almost ashamed to say this, being so cavalier about other people’s lives, but following celebrity antics is almost like a soap opera or reality TV programme.

Sure, how much can you really know about a celebrity, someone you’ve never met or don’t know personally? But sometimes, a picture is worth a thousand words and body language or social media activity can be a big indicator about what’s going on in the lives of the rich, famous and good-looking.

I was always a little skeptical about Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck as a couple – mainly because it was only on their second movie together that Ben Affleck actually noticed her. They both starred in Pearl Harbor together (although Affleck was a lead character, while Garner part of the supporting cast), but it wasn’t until the movie Daredevil that their romance kicked off.

I dunno, I think if a guy likes you he’s gonna ask you out, then and there. There’s very little that will hold a guy back from something he REALLY wants. It’s the reason why I advise women to never chase men – if he’s interested enough, you won’t have to. Sure, you might get the guy in the short-term by chasing him, but in the long-term it rarely works out (of-course, Pearl Harbor could have just been bad timing for both as they may have been seeing other people).

Another thing that was a slight red-flag about Ben Affleck is how his relationship with Jennifer Lopez ended - he seemed really into Lopez when he was with her, but then called time on their engagement due to intense media scrutiny (the couple were dubbed "Bennifer" at the time), and how his romance with Lopez was resulting in him being taken less seriously as an actor.

That seems like a really shallow reason to call things off with someone; someone who you have proposed marriage to. Look at Brad Pitt – did he let Angelina Jolie’s reputation as a slightly out-there wild child affect how he felt about her? Even Kanye has said his coupling with Kim Kardashian led to him losing friends in the snooty fashion circuit, but he still stood by his gal.

If something like that, which has little relevance to ACTUAL married life and is more the downside to celebrity or based on other people’s opinions and actions, is enough to scare you off marriage and turn your back on the woman you supposedly love, then you’re probably not marriage material.

Such a judgmental, selfish attitude doesn’t bode well for marriage, as we’ve learnt from Kris Humphries. Also, if your first instinct when dealing with rough situations is to run then that’s not great either.

If you look at red-carpet appearances or interviews, it’s clear that Jennifer Garner is besotted with him…but the affection doesn’t seem as strong from his side. More recently, the unhappiness and lack of chemistry between them has been even more evident.

Which leads me to another point; I really hate to sound shallow, old-fashioned and sexist but I do think women should try to look good for their man, at least some of the time.

Of course, a marriage or any other relationship will need more than looks for it to survive, but I do think psychical attraction and chemistry are important components, at least until you hit old age. Especially when you’re with a rich, famous A-List celebrity who is probably surrounded by beautiful women all the time; you have to sometimes remind men what they have. 

It’s not even that Ben Affleck is out of Jennifer Garner’s league; she is stunning. Paparazzi shots of her though seem to be less than flattering. And I get it, who can be bothered to be dressed to the nines everyday, especially if you’re busy being a mum and have been married for years. But in a shallow, looks-based industry like Hollywood, I think it’s worth putting in just a little bit of extra effort, especially if you can afford to.

Heck, even I feel awkward when I go to work looking like a tramp and I notice people are a lot nicer to me on days that I look more presentable. And to be honest looking good, or at least better than I do when I’m lounging about the house, makes ME feel confident too.

I hate to deduce men as brainless, but they are visual creatures and I think physical attraction is an important component in maintaining a relationship.

I know when you get old everything goes south, but hopefully by then you would have built a strong bond based on shared values. But while you still have your looks, you should take pride in your appearance and make the most of it.

Ten years though - that’s a long time. By Hollwood’s standards especially, that’s almost a lifetime and their marriage had a good run. It’s a real shame things didn’t work out between them.

Ben Affleck doesn’t seem like a douchebag in the traditional sense (although there has been speculation that gambling and drinking played a part in their split), I just think he’s emotionally unavailable. Some men just don’t have it in them to be husband material.

The fact that his (famous) ex-girlfriends comment that, nice guy as he is, he left them all broken-hearted and disappointed could perhaps have been an indicator that this wasn’t going to work out.

It certainly was to us who follow showbiz gossip. Other couples I don’t see lasting are Eva Mendes/Ryan Gosling and Justin Timberlake/Jessica Biel. On the men’s part, there just seems to be a certain chemistry or affection lacking.

No comments:

Post a Comment